Breakfast and Bugs

Breakfast on the back porch. Morning sun peeking through the shadows of the trees. Cool breeze blowing, no hint of the heat of the day that is to come. God's Word and intimacy with Him.
This is my favorite part of the day. :)

I'm thinking a lot about parenting. Today's verse was about resting, and making plans to ensure that my child gets rest. That we don't pack our schedules too full. I like this reminder.

But there's something I fear I'll struggle with even more than that...

I couldn't bring it all in one trip. I had to bring out the food, then go back in for coffee, then a third trip to get my Bible and devotional book. (Okay, bookS) Upon finally sitting down, I realized I had forgotten my napkin. So I got up once more, leaving it all unattended, to get the napkin and come right back.

Now I trust that no bugs landed on my food or in my coffee during those few seconds. But what if I had been gone longer? No neighbor's cat came around, to steal my food. No birds pecking at it. No strong thunderstorm arose to blow my books off the table or get them wet. But eventually, had I not returned, all of this and more could have happened.

I worry, genuinely worry, about the bad things that could happen to our child. (or children, future tense)

I feel an almost-intolerable burden to protect my child from EVERYthing, and to make sure his life is perfect even from conception before he gets here.

I want him to love the Lord.

I want him to be generous; in spirit, in love, and with his things.

I want him to worship, even from a young age.

I want him to respect authority. And I want him to be a thinker. And to have balance between the two.

I want him to do many things: sports AND computers, music AND reading, and math, and a social life, and outdoors, and driving fast (not too fast) and walking slow!

I want so much for our smiley little man. And with every desire of my heart, I feel fear. I'm asking God to remove the fear and just simply EQUIP me to be this child's mother. I'm asking for a huge responsibility, so I'm praying for the stuff to back it up.

Lord help me, I'm willing.

But I know I have to lay down the fear.